Biography

Hola. Cómo está?
My name is Chuz.
Or you could call me Zenn.

I'm a computer & chilli addict :D

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WVPS
CCKSS
SP - Architecture


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A lesson learnt the hard way.

I just failed my first assignment; even before the critique session. I've got nothing to regret, it was my choice to slack, and procrastinate to the very last moment before I even decided to start work. I really hate this fucking trait of mine, and I really want to change it, but it's easier said than done. I can only take this as points lost in a lot of ways.



I guess I'm being branded as a slacker in class, which is not something I like to be known as. The only thing I can do is to buck up for the next project and not skip any more lessons. If I want to do it, I gotta do it well. I want to redeem myself.

Sometimes you gotta choose between what is right and what is easy

The right thing I did, too late it was.

Somehow...

Yes, Primer 1 is finally coming to an end. Problem is, I have not started on my first, second, combined and blown up models yet. Not to mention my documentation as well. No worries there though, I got enough time on my hands to finish them all; 2 days. If worse comes to worst, I still have 2 nights. I'm going to produce something.


I've gotten myself into a dilemma - blue or black?

Get well soon.

The 300th.

It's not over yet - I hope. I'm stuck for my proj :/ But I want to put an end to it.

I realised I can do well for it, as long as I attend all my lessons (a hard task) and complete my projects (an even more insurmountable task).

And I'm going to take it to a whole new level. I'm going to set down some goals for my self, and by the end of my first year, I'm going to accomplish everything.

- Learn Autodesk Revit, basic and intermediate. (Although the lecturer said we will learn it in 2nd year, I'd rather not leave it till then. Though 3d is not my cup of tea, it will go a long way for my future.)

- Master Autodesk 3dsmax, as much as I can. (This is something I regret not learning properly in my secondary school years when I had the chance. I'm going to make up for that.)

-Perfect Adobe Photoshop. (This is easily the easiest and the part which I like the most. I've got almost everything I need, and all I need to do is to fill in the blanks during Photoshop tutorials in school.)

-Learn Illustrator, Flash and Dreamweaver. (This is seriously hard, but the usefulness of these programs cannot be ignored; proficiency in these will benefit for sure.)

-Finish reading the Oxford Dictionary. (I've ever browsed through it before, to improve my bank of words, but now I want to really peruse it. Walking dictionary for the win.)

-Make more than 25 friends in class (This, I'm on the fence, since I got no idea if I want to or not. And of course the other party as well.)

That's about as much as I can think of. I dont dare to put a target for my GPA, because I know unless I start on my project, it's about as high as someone with withdrawal symptoms.

Happy birthday, my (Y) friend.

Boon tat's birthday today, and was it helluva fun. 17 of us made it for the celebration at Marche, and damn, it sure was good meeting up with the old friends. Like always, we were noisy and unruly. The food was good, and so was the bill; 665 effing buckz. The good old days - it has been a long time since I've had so much fun like that.

I killed the extrovert in me.

Garri, Ivan, Dom and XX came over for a housewarming, and also for the former 2 to dye their hair purplish purple. More or less pass, but a tad too dark for my liking.

Aft that, I went to ton alone at XX's house, no thanks to the pangseh of the rest. Nothing fanciful there; no gay sacks nor bling blings. The conversation that we had was good tho.

I kinda realised that it's impractical to want to change course, especially when the journey is just starting. Let's just hope the situation does not remain as it is; which I'm actually okay with, just that obviously it can get better. And I should also remove the notion that I want to change course from my brain; which is seriously impeding my progress in trying to acclimatise into the class and course.

My project is screwed for now, but I'm going to dedicate the whole of tmr to do all the shit that I can, and hope I got something decent to present come monday.


After today's work, I realised making friends is as easy as opening your mouth, provided both parties aren't retarded. So I'll prolly open my mouth a bit more and maybe use my brain a bit more; it seems to be degenerating :S

An alarming revelation.

There exists gulfs between people. It is normal to a point where it stretches too wide, or becomes so negligible it almost disappears. I feel the former with my classmates now, and I know it's goddamn hard to find just one from the former. I'm still hoping (Y). Because I think I've found a potential one; one whom I hope will click well. Intrapersonal ftw.


Help plz, need creativity which, despite all the inspiration I feed myself like daily, is lacking. Like seriously, I can do nothing freestyle if you dont set a mold. :S

Just because you look like a fucktard doesnt give you the prerogative to act like one.

Yes you, I know I dont know you well, or even at all, but from your fucking attitude, I wouldn't deign to know you. I may be mistaken, but my opinion says you are retarded; and it's almost always right. And I'm entitled to it as well.


On a brighter note, the lecturers in my class aren't as inflexible as those in other courses. They take the effort to talk and understand us, which I'd say is something I like in this course.


I want to start on self-improvement; something I've been thinking about(for like eons). First up will be my vocab, which is totally half baked. Yes, I know a lot of words, but I know nuts about the full or exact definitions of half of them. It's kind of embarrassing when people ask you,"Hey, what does ______ mean?" "Oh, I'm not sure." That sucks.


I'm thinking if I should prepare myself for a change of course. I cannot say I'm unhappy at Architecture, it's just that I am stopping myself from being normal. The projects will be bitches too. Of course, I hope I will stay, but ultimately, only time will tell.

Everyone has secrets. Some we keep to protect ourselves, others to protect those we love.

Understanding has to be mutual.

Solitude is impossible in my course, which sadly is something I rather have over having to team up with the ppl in my class. Not to say they are any worse or that I'm any superior; it's just that oil and water can't mix. Though it has only been a few weeks, the class is already segregated into several cliques.

I understand all that is said, but at the end of the day, if you dont understand where I'm coming from, you will not know why I do what I do. Everything happens for a reason.


I still cant find you. Not anywhere.

Is it really for me?

Doubts finally surfaced, after all the reaffirmations I fed myself. I cannot force myself to do drawings and models - at least not for the distant future. I was thinking of changing courses today, to anything that doesnt require drawing. But the lecturer's words struck me; give Architecture a chance. 1 year it is.

I think too much, but that's much better than not thinking no? At least I arm myself mentally rather than to leap into the fray blind. I'll show you what is powerful. Watch me.


I got myself figured, but now I have to figure others out and to stretch out socially.